


He Left.

by Tonystarkisaslut



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Minor Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers, Multi, Tony Stark Dies, not shown in fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-28 12:59:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19812781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tonystarkisaslut/pseuds/Tonystarkisaslut
Summary: Poly relationship with Sam/Bucky/Steve; dealing with the aftermath of Steve leaving this time to go back to Peggy.





	He Left.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn’t get this idea out of my head for so long! So I decided to write it.

Bucky doesn’t know how everything that happened happened, but he knows he’s happy he’s here, with Steve.

Steve, who knows Tony Stark; the Tony Stark that happened to come up with a device called ‘BARF’ that can help him learn how to work through what’s real and what isn’t. Who can help him get out of the mind control.

(Read more here)

It took years, but he got better, with the help of Steve. Steve, and Sam.

Sam is an asshole. He’s mean to Bucky, he’s self righteous, and over protective of Steve.

Bucky fell in love so fast, he confused himself.

When Bucky fell in love with Steve, it was gradual. It was years and years of growing up together, of being friends. It was slow and inevitable. He loved Steve so much he knew he would never stop, ever. It was slow steps, and soft kisses, and whispered confessions. It was snuggling when it was cold, it was kissing while giving each other hand jobs and not anything more because Bucky fell off the damn train before he was ready to take that step.

It just wasn’t like that with Sam at all.

It was hard and fast and dangerous with Sam. It was love at first sight. It was giant leaps, and biting lips, and growled curses in the dark. It was sparring on the training mat, fucking rough and deep and fast and forcing Sam to stay after because Bucky hates being alone after sex.

He gets soft and warm and loving from Steve. Steve loves him, cuddles him. Helps him through panic attacks and showers with him and holds his hand. Their sex alone is slow, living, giggling and talking and kissing the whole time.

He gets the opposite from Sam. Sam loves him, roughs him up. Helps him get his aggression out through sparring or play fighting. Their sex is rough and loud and biting and making out.

The three of them together are completely different than either of them. Sam is always rough, with both of them. He just likes it rough. Intense. He doesn’t like laughing during sex or soft, or emotional. Steve is rougher when Sam is there. Rougher than he usually is anyway. Bucky doesn’t know how they are alone without him. Steve says they’re rough too, but it isn’t biting or scratching like Bucky and Sam do it. It’s just loud and fast and hard and grunts. Animalistic.

When Bucky first came back, he learned a lot of things about his love. 

One; he fell in love with Peggy while Bucky was away. Bucky had been told about Peggy when they first met up during the war, and even then Bucky encouraged him to go for it. They’re both—there’s a word for it in the 21st century… polyamory? Maybe—polyamorous, and he never minded sharing Steve. 

Two; Steve tried to kill himself shortly after Bucky fell off the train. 

Three; when Steve came back, he didn’t cope very well. He visited Bucky’s memorial plaque every day, he stared a relationship with Peggy’s great niece—which ended quick—and then fell in love with Sam.

Bucky came back and Sam hated him. He hated him, because Steve was so obviously in love with Bucky. Put himself, Sam, and Peggy’s niece in danger to try and save Bucky.

But Steve got him secured, drug him to Tony. Tony helped him get fixed up, and in the process learned Bucky had killed Tony’s parents.

Tony would have killed Bucky, but Bucky had broken down when he came out of the BARF simulation and saw Tony’s face.

“I didn’t know I did that!” He had sobbed. “He was one of my best friends, I fought with him, he saved me so many times—I would be dead without him—I-“ he had ripped the wires, sobbing and kicking and making a mess of Tony’s lab. “And what did I do to ever repay him? I killed him and his wife.” He had pulled his hair, facing away from Tony and sobbing through his panic attack.

Tony couldn’t take it anymore. He told Bucky it wasn’t his fault. He knew that. He knew that, he read the reports before he decided to help Bucky. He knew that when the mind control activated, he had no memory of what happened. He had no choice in anything he did. It was what he had been telling Bucky so far to help him through panic attacks. He used it now too. He knew it wasn’t Bucky’s fault.

There was a rift, in their friendship, after that. But it was better than what could have happened.

When the accords came, Bucky signed without hesitation, just as Tony did. Sam, at this point, admitted he loved Bucky too. The real Bucky, not the Winter Soldier. Sam trusted Bucky, the real Bucky. He signed too.

Steve tried to talk them out of it, but Bucky had won that argument. “I need someone else to be in charge of me. Of us. I can’t- I can’t be like that-that again. I have to know I’m doing the right thing. I have to know that I’m not going to kill anyone innocent again-“

And Steve has signed, if only to make Bucky stop crying.

Bucky had been happy. So happy. He had the two people he loved. It was all he needed.

And yeah, they had missions and stuff, but for the most part it was just… quiet. Calm. Lovely.

And then it all went south.

Bucky doesn’t know much. He knows they had to fight in Wakanda, and he loves Wakanda. Particularly princess Shuri, who is no-bull-shit, and honest and he loves that. He loved it a lot when he was trying to remember who he was.

So they went to Wakanda and fought a bunch of alien people. And then he had to fight the giant purple one, and they lost. And Sam turned to dust in front of his eyes. And several other people, including the T’challa. And Steve turned to him, eyes wide and scared and then- and then Steve was gone.

He had gone to Sam, who was waiting there for him. There were so many people. So many. He learned later, it was half of the entire universe. And he learned later that the five minutes he spent in the place, five years went on for Steve.

It took Steve five years to save them, but better late than never.

And then they entered the world again and had to fight the purple alien again and this time they won because Tony was there. But Tony died and Bucky didn’t like that. But it saved everyone else, so Bucky and Sam and Steve went to the funeral. And Bucky kneeled on the edge of the lake and whispered ‘I’m so sorry Tony. You should have given me the gauntlet.’

And then, after, Steve had to return all the soul stones to their proper place. Sam and Bucky waited at the platform for Steve to come back.

Bruce said that it would be five seconds.

But it’s been ten seconds, and Bucky is feeling anxious again. He plays with his jacket zipper, looking around as Sam yells at Bruce to get Steve back. And then—

And then it all stops.

Bucky grabs Sam’s arm, and when his lover looks at him, Bucky points to Steve.

Sam goes over, but Bucky doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to go over. He doesn’t.

He doesn’t hear what Sam and Steve say. But Sam looks upset, and he comes back with the shield and-

“He left.” Sam said when he got back to Bucky. He threw the shield into the dirt, going over and punching a tree.

Bucky looked over at Steve, who is staring at the lake where Tony’s arc reactor was released. He goes over slowly, not wanting to look at Steve. He can’t. He can’t.

“I’m sorry, Buck.” Steve whispers. “When I saw her… I saw her and I… I wanted to try it. Try having a life with her. Having kids with her.”

Bucky uses his human hand to rub over his mouth as he listens. The weight of Sam’s words heavier all the sudden.

“I shouldn’t have. I wish I hadn’t stayed. I wish I came back. I had to live my entire life without you and Sam-“

Bucky steps back, which makes Steve look at him. Bucky turns, looking at Sam boxing with a tree. He feels a tear fall down his face. “This entire time, I thought I was irrational to be afraid you didn’t love me as much.” Bucky puts his hands in his pockets.

“Buck… please, I-“

Bucky walks over to Sam, not wanting to hear it. He takes Sam’s hand, kissing where the skin broke and peeled because of the rough bark.

“He left.” Sam whispers.

Sam doesn’t do emotions like this. He hates them. He hates it all. Bucky knows this. Steve knew it. Bucky intertwines their fingers. “He left us.” He repeats.

Sam looks at Bucky, seeing the amount of hurt there makes Sam wish he were dead. Steve dealt with this part. The emotion part. The hurt part. Sam doesn’t know how to do this.

But Bucky just smiles sadly, kissing Sam softly on the lips and handing Sam the shield. “So, Captain America.” He starts, pulling back and squeezing his hands. “This has been the most eventful day of my life.”

Sam snorts, rubbing his neck a bit. “This has been the longest day of our lives. 5 year long day, how about that?” He tried to joke.

Bucky smiles and pulls his hand back. “I seem to remember a very specific way you like to calm down after a long, eventful day.” He leans forward, biting Sam’s earlobe. “A specific way that involves closed doors.”

Sam closes his eyes. He’s going to have to figure out how to take care of Bucky in a way he needs. Bucky already knows how to take care of Sam… he looks over Bucky’s shoulder at Steve, who is staring at them, looking heartbroken. He clenches his jaw, pulling Bucky closer to him. He’ll learn how, without Steve’s help. He pulls back, smirking at Bucky. “Then let’s go find a door to close.”


End file.
